She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
We have started to decorate penises.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
