fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
