that's an acceptable place to lick
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
