office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
So squirting runs in the family.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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