marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
this will be a night to untag.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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