I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
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