i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize