I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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