So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
