I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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