I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
