I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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