Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize