Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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