She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize
