Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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