Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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