so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
