i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Bring me that man meat
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
