Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
