Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
