1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
