please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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