The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize