Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
