I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
