that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
