My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize
