her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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