i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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