At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
