I don't remember. Are we still dating?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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