Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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