Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
