i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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