i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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