I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
