you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
