I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
