Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
