To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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