he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
