Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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