shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
