And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
