Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
