drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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