Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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