hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
