Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Randomize
