he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
